Single motherhood is finishing school for bad bitches. - Gemma Germains
Although I don't know these women personally, they collectively have made me to be happy about where I find myself in my life right now, and even honoured, to share the same demographic! These single mums are bravely sharing their experiences and talking openly about challenges with managing financially, mentally and emotionally with single motherhood.
I am so grateful to be able to fall asleep knowing that others have made it and so will I. That everything will eventually turn out alright, that I will make it work, and to have 10's of reasons to fall back on as to why I made the right decision ...maybe even the BEST decisions.
Before I would be endlessly punishing myself for mistakes I made, wondering whether I screwed up my life completely or just a bit and replaying my entire life's story debating where I went wrong. Feeling happy with being a single mum, I am sure, is preventing all sorts of expensive health problems (which I cannot afford anyway)!
'A Girl Named Jack' by Jack Manroe
Finding herself a single mum at the age of 24, working as local newspaper reporter and only £10 food budget, Jack got to work. She began to create nutritious recipes to feed herself and her son. Giving the recipes out to a local food bank, to help others in her situation, many are available on her blog now. You can also pre-order her next book for less than the price of a take away:
Jack was awarded the 2013 Fortnum and Mason Judges' Choice Award for the impact that her blog has had. She lives in Essex with her son.
'More than Toast' by Alice
I became a single mum 8 years ago, an experience that, following a hefty bout of acute post-natal depression, left me at rock bottom.
I love her posts Learning To Love That I’m a Single Parent and How Do Children Feel About Divorce? I Asked Mine.
'Savy Solo Mama' by Emma Louise Smith
I’m a solo mama from Surrey in the UK. Back in 2010, I found myself still single at 38 so I decided to use a sperm donor to have a baby. Now I help other single women make motherhood a reality, and teach single mamas that while it may not be not Plan A, Plan B (or is Y or Z !?) can be bloody brilliant.
You can read her recent update about her blog and life here.
'Wealthy Single Mommy' by Emma Johnson
New York based author who co-parents with her ex-partner (trigger warning: she speaks a lot about her belief in kids sharing their time 50/50 between mum's and dad's house and I know that's not an option for everyone). I found her book hugely inspirational - you know that way that a sexy pair of heels can make you feel that you can take on the whole world AND any invading aliens? ...that's what her book did for me! Regardless of your views on time sharing her book includes racy chapters about sex lives of single mums and an inspirational manifesto she takes through to her finances.
'Confessions of a Single Mum' by Kairen
Kairen is a single mum to two. Striving to help other parents get organised and manage on limited funds. She divorced when her youngest was about 2 (her kids are now 21 and 19). She says:
'I knew what it was like to have days when the only adult you talked to was the postman if you were lucky. I knew what it was like to juggle work, child care and a life. I did the online dating, I did the cringe-able dates and I did everything else in-between. I wanted other single parents to know it was actually ok to be a single parent. So I created Confessions of a Single Mum to shout about it.'
I really appreciated her post about Universal Credit treats the Self Employed, it made me review my goals.
'Slummy Single Mummy' by Jo
Jo is a journalist-turned Slummy Single Mummy, as well as her first grandson, she has her first novel on its way - 'Playgroups and Prosecco: The (mis)adventures of a single mum'. Now, her two kids are 23 and 16. Her blog is a good mix of articles with a few sponsored articles thrown in. I enjoyed her post '23 things I've learnt in 23 years as a parent'.
Who says 'Motherhood is finishing school for bad bitches'?
And now to the post that inspired this article... I don't know anything about Gemma Germains but this is an article she wrote, also on Medium:
Single motherhood is really hard. It’s exhausting and stressful and sometimes just a massive pain the arse. What it’s not, is impossible. It doesn’t destroy women. It makes them resourceful and wiley. It teaches women to do a lot with very little. It makes them strong and independent and capable of dealing with pressures that might cripple a paediatric neurologist. You can read the rest of her article here.
Remember.... we can do this!
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